To Process My Own Pain
I’m not unique. I have physical pain. Some of them are significant. Yet I recognize there are many other people in more pain than me. Emotional pain. I feel that too. Whether emotional, mental, physical, or relational, pain is universal.
Everyone Deals with Pain.
Every person we know wrestles with pain. Most of us do it quietly. Not opening up about how heavy it is to carry this burden. Alone. We cry out. We isolate. We run from it. Can we be honest about something? We are not well. Individually. Culturally. Even – spiritually – we are not well. We bury our pain, and others pay the price down the road. We numb our pain, and our body pays the consequence anyway.
Helping Other People in Pain
I’ve been a pastor for 30 years. Pretty much every time I’m asked for help, it involves a person in pain. Yes, pastors get to walk through celebrations too. Weddings, births, baptisms. We love what we do. But if you are in pain, you probably talk to your pastor. A visit at the hospital, a conversation over lunch or coffee, an appointment for counseling. We need a better understanding about where God is in our pain.
Pastors are Hurting Too
Pastors are tired. A myriad of reasons, but primarily it’s because we help people carry their pain. It’s heavy. And many of us pastors are not well. Many of us are bummed out and burned out. We’re just now beginning to see the long-term consequences of leading through a generational crisis over the last four years. Pain is normal. Burnout doesn’t have to be.
A Better Way to Process Pain
Let’s be straight. The vast majority of us don’t handle pain well. For every person who does, there are dozens of us numbing, escaping, burying, and running from it. In walking with addicts, sinners, and frankly – just human beings, I’ve noticed a common pattern among those who do not handle their pain well. I call it The Pity Vortex. We’re sucked into a way of thinking that pushes us away from healthy living. Even more, it pushes us away from Jesus. There has to be a better way to handle our pain. There is.
Fatigue and Faith
My own experience with chronic pain and chronic fatigue left me wondering: Can we be stronger? Is Scripture right when it says, “When I am weak, then I am strong”? Is it really possible to be strengthened in the Lord? How does that work? Is there a way to persevere in the face of chronic pain and fatigue, or worse, woundedness and trauma? Yes. I outline five pivotal choices, called The Perseverance Revolution, that when made rightly and consistently, build resilient faith, stronger minds, relational bonds, and internal strength.
Stronger Under Pressure
Can we become stronger under pressure? Can we live anti-fragile lives? When we take control of our choices, specifically those that trap us in pity, we learn to make healthier decisions. We don’t eliminate our pain, but we do move forward in spite of it.
A Journey Together
In Letters to My Friends in Pain, I’ll take us on a journey through five shifts to our mindset that determine the difference between pity and perseverance. It’s a journey I would love for you to take with me and some of my friends in pain. I’m not promising I will remove the pain in your life, but I am pointing us to the One who will one day end pain, suffering, sin, grief, and death – forever.